'The Drama' (Vendors' Version)

There's been no shortage of ink spilled about a provocative new film with a grabby central premise/"twist" from Norwegian filmmaker Kristoffer Borgli (Dream Scenario, Drib). The Drama — an A24 distributed, Zendaya x Robert Pattinson starring cringe comedy — hit theaters last week with sights set squarely on hijacking the discourse. Mission accomplished and perhaps exceeded because a common refrain has emerged: Is this a movie, or a 90-ish minute thought experiment? A thought experiment, it should be noted, that just happens to be performed by some of the hottest people who have ever existed in some of the most enviable locations to have ever been located (our central couple's Cambridge, Massachusetts apartment with its spiral staircase to the loft bedroom is worthy of its own essay).

Borgli has a distinctive style that I found myself acclimating and then re-acclimating to throughout, I've seen none of his previous films so I was learning how to grapple with his work in real time. The story of Zendaya and Pattinson's (Emma and Charlie's) relationship is told primarily through flashbacks as they conceptualize vows and prepare for their wedding which is happening that weekend. And once the secret is out, the flashbacks and forays into fantasy shift into high gear. This isn't revolutionary, the bonafide blockbuster Project Hail Mary is told in a similarly fragmented way, but there's a wilder combination at play in The Drama; Daniel Pemberton's prominently off-kilter score, the elliptical nature of our main characters and their relationship to each other, the fact that every side character is here to radiate their whole deal at you in five minutes or less... All of it adds up to make sure you (the viewer) will never find yourself on solid ground.

I agree that The Drama is a thought experiment first and foremost. That's because it is an experimental film. And an experimental film anchored by franchise stars is inevitably going to require some Olympic level mental gymnastics. Vulture's Alison Willmore describes Borgli as a "40-something art-house edgelord" and that pretty much nails it. His tenuous regard for actual reality is kind of the point, and yet, as I've been sitting with my response to this film for days now, one massive question keeps plaguing me: What in the hallowed tabs of the knot dot com is going on with this movie's relationship to wedding coordination?

We begin by watching Charlie and Emma's one click away from creepy coffee shop meet (cute?), then we're whisked away for the reveal that this is being reiterated by Charlie to his friend Mike (Mamoudou Athie) as they work together to polish Charlie's vows. This is extremely normal behavior for the week before a wedding. If anything, Charlie is a little ahead of the game. Pretty soon, we're watching Charlie and Emma rehearse their choreographed first dance. Excessive? Sure. But if you're the type to be doing a choreographed first dance, it tracks that you'd be practicing down to the wire. Real life choreographer and filmmaker Celia Rowlson-Hall plays the instructor and she's the first wedding-adjacent professional to project her general dissatisfaction with life at these two. "Weddings are supposed to be performative," she snarls at Charlie in response to a very reasonable question: "Why can't we just dance normal?"

From the dance rehearsal, it's on to a final tasting with the caterers, but we (the audience) don't know this yet. What we do know is that they are 99.9 percent sure they see Pauline, the wedding DJ they've presumably interacted with multiple times and paid a hefty deposit, smoking heroin in a group in front of an apartment building. This is the story they tell themselves anyway. They don't approach this woman to check in, see if she's still good to work on Saturday, ask if she wouldn't mind doing a drug test, etc. Instead, they carry on to meet their friends Mike and Rachel (Alana Haim) for dinner. A dinner that we quickly realize is one last tasting to finalize the menu for their not-small wedding that is happening on SATURDAY. We never know exactly what day of the week we're on at any given moment, but it is strongly implied that the wedding is less than a week away. The caterer is the only one of the many vendors that they interact with to give any indication that their indecisiveness and punting of everything to the last possible minute is extremely not cool. Like, this is interfering with multiple people's ability to do their jobs, actually. Once the caterer has informed them in no uncertain terms that their commitment to the mushroom risotto has to be final this time, they assure her that yes, yes, they know... but also they need one more bottle of the skin contact wine, just to be absolutely sure about that choice. We follow the caterer back to the kitchen to retrieve the bottle, she shares a glance with her equally exasperated coworker who loudly exclaims: "This is not a bar." I've never been more on the side of a single line character in a film in my entire life. In retrospect, these caterers might be the only relatable characters here, the only element that tethers this whole affair to the real world in any way, shape, or form.

Back in the dining room, our oblivious double daters discuss the DJ's assumed public heroin use as they savor their bonus wine and extracted labor from the staff that should have been off the clock and at an actual bar by now. The DJ chatter prompts the big question that the rest of the film hinges on: "What's the worst thing you've ever done?" Not one of them stops to consider that idling around a catering hall, pretending to be undecided about wine that needs to be scaled to serve a crowd THAT WEEKEND, and tossing out big existential quandaries when they're already many drinks deep is pretty high up on that list.

The next day, after the big reveal, Emma and Charlie hit the photographer's studio to finalize the shot list. This is the most "could have been an email" in the history of meetings that could have been emails, but the photographer is played by Zoë Winters (of Succession and Materialists fame) so she has to see them in person and recognize that something is wrong. They do a little test shoot in her studio (sure, why not)? At this point, the Zoë Winters of it all, plus the rule of threes, has revealed to me a pattern. This couple is going to continue running around town to complete tasks that should have been done months ago and each new performer that they encounter will flood the IYKYK receptors of at least half the audience of a given screening. Realizing this doesn't make any of what comes next any less jarring. After the photographer, they hit the florist to sign off on the bespoke arrangements that will be delivered to their wedding venue in... three to five days?? (Truly what is time)? The only follow-up asked by the florist is: "Late night?" After Emma and Charlie sort of nod and mumble to confirm, he responds "yeah, me too" in a manner that makes me want to encourage him to sign up for a Moth Story Slam. What did he get up to last night? There's a whole world behind his eyes and his slutty little earring.

Other scenes happen that mostly deal with the big bad thing and also reveal that, in addition to finalizing everything with their vendors week of, neither of them took any time off from work. Ok.

Wedding day! Charlie and Emma casually stroll into the venue together in their street clothes while Heroin DJ is so far along in her setup that she's checking levels with one of her old tracks. She mentions something about needing a different cable, but the sound was flawless. She seems poised, calm, collected, and not strung out at all. Charlie asks about the track and she gets a distant dreamy look when she reveals that she doesn't make her own music anymore, life just had other plans. Emma then confronts her about "smoking heroin," she denies it, Emma presses the issue and Heroin DJ quits on the spot. So many follow up questions. Was she connecting to a house PA? Was there not a walk through where it was very clearly established who would be providing what gear (including cables)? Did she not have a check list? But far more importantly, WHY ARE YOU ONLY NOW BRINGING UP HER ALLEGED DRUG USE WHEN SHE IS IN THE MIDDLE OF SOUNDCHECK AND YOUR GUESTS WILL BE ARRIVING MOMENTARILY?

They do their ceremony, cocktail hour, and the majority of dinner with no music. As toasts and speeches are beginning to unfold with no microphones in a cavernous room with what looks like upwards of 75 to 100 guests, Backup DJ arrives. He's a recognizable comedy guy (I know him from Everybody's Live With John Mulaney) and he immediately tries to find anyone in his general vicinity to nerd out with him about gear. He sets up in the middle of dinner, has the same cable issue that Heroin DJ does (no one who cares this much about gear isn't traveling with every cable known to man), but it's here that we learn that the cable kerfuffles are only there to be in service of a sound gag that's needed to interrupt a crucial moment in one of the toasts. It also doesn't matter! The wedding devolves from there for reasons that have nothing to do with Backup DJ. Everyone flees in shock before he can play a single note through his very special DJ setup.

I wonder if anyone who has never been married or worked in events would bat an eye at all of the above, but I also wonder if the seemingly afterthought nature of the wedding is part of what has people questioning how much thought was put into any story elements that didn't tie back to the shocking revelation? This thing that, again, really should be a moot point, because all four of the characters involved in the scene where the information is divulged deserve jail time for their blatant abuse of service industry professionals.

I'd be inclined to agree that the wedding was an afterthought were it not for all of those extremely developed bit parts. My current theory is that we're meant to be operating in dream logic the whole time, not in the sense that "it was all a dream and none of it really happened," more like Emma and Charlie are somehow still together 10 years from now and they are attempting to tell their new friends about "The Drama" that was their wedding.

The more I sit with what I watched, the more convinced I am that the vibes (all the vibes) are supposed to be off at every turn. I.e. everything that I find baffling about the world of this movie is that way on purpose. It's a highly engaging piece of art with a singular storytelling structure and I'm glad that I engaged. But if you somehow read all of this before you've seen the film, and you have ever worked a wedding, brace yourself.